Girl Interrupted: How to Cope When Life Gets in the Way

By October 24, 2012 Life, Life Advice
Me

Life happens. To the best of us. Things change; we lose a job, move to another city, break up with a significant other, lose a loved one. And when life comes crashing down or sweeping in sometimes you have to take a step back to regain your footing. Being sidelined by life is never easy but it is natural and it’s imperative that you take time to get yourself back to 100%.

Case in point: Things have been a little slow around here lately. For this I do apologize. My recent move to New York and getting acquainted with myself in this new place has taken a bit of the gust out of my sails. Between packing, moving, commuting, working, commuting, reading and writing there hasn’t been much time in life for well life.

It beeeeeeezzzzzz like that sometimes.

So what do you do when life gets in the way of doing the things you love?

Freeze. Have a Seat. Reset

Freeze

Stopping can be the most beneficial thing you can do when  good or bad fortune befalls you. It may seem nullifying or like you’re stuck in quicksand but stopping can prevent you from spinning your wheels, messing things up due to lack of focus, even burning yourself out. When I moved I made the conscious decision to give myself some time to just stop. It felt horrible and I missed writing for you guys but doing a half-arsed job was not an option.

When life is happening and your focus shifts it’s okay to hit the pause button and tend to the things you have to do. Your work, personal health and well-being are your top priority.

Have a Seat

After you’ve come to terms with stopping (or considerably slowing down) have a seat. Not a literal seat, but a figurative seat. Get your bearings straight and try, TRY, as you might to keep your mind off of the world going on around you.

Sometimes taking a break can feel like you’re taking a step back or conceding defeat but don’t fall into the mind trap. When you have to get your bearings straight that’s the only thing that matters. And instead of worrying about what you’re missing our on or what other people are doing, focus on what you can do to restore yourself and get ready to return to your normal routine.

Read lots of books. Watch movies. Spend time with family and friends. Reconnect with yourself. Personally, I’m taking this time to focus on areas of my life that I’ve neglected like my health, finances and other creative endeavors.

Reset

Each stop is an opportunity to reset ourselves and prepare for the road ahead. By resetting your mind, body and spirit you are allowing the lessons to sink in and propel you forward.

But how will you know when it’s time to get on with your life as usual? You will know. The path will be clear and there will be space to do the things you need to do. You will be able to get back to your life and plans with more knowledge and a renewed spirit.

Sometimes we’re heading down a path and life comes in and interrupts our journey or puts us in an uncomfortable place. Don’t begrudge these changes, roll with them. Embrace them and let them teach and propel you to the next stop on your destination.

Have you ever been interrupted by life? How did you manage? Please share! We can benefit from each others’ stories!

Under the Influence: Teddy Girls

By October 17, 2012 Fashion, Style Inspiration
Teddy Girl Reincarnated

Sometimes we gravitate to a particular style or way of dressing unintentionally. We pick out a blouse, pair it with a certain skirt, shoes and before we know it our style has been wholly influenced. With so much inspiration out in the world, it’s easy to be influenced by a cool subliminal style.

Currently my fashion sense has been inundated with the starkness of black and white, penny loafers and cuffed trousers. I don’t know why or when, but I am currently under the influence of the 1950′s Teddy Girl style. Tough, masculine and casual. Teddy Girls ruled the roost and are clearly ruling my style.

Check out more photos of Teddy Girls from the fifties.

Images reposted from here and here

What style is currently influencing you?

New Beginnings: In Style and Life

By October 3, 2012 Fashion, Life, Stylish Thoughts

“Just around the corner in every woman’s mind – is a lovely dress, a wonderful suit, or entire costume which will make an enchanting new creature of her.”
— Wilhela Cushman

Source

[divider style="shadow"]

Fall is an effervescent time, when renewal is fresh in the air. The September issues have hit the stands and have since been discarded. New trends are already lining the racks in your favorite clothing stores. The world is abuzz with newness.

Fresh on our minds is transformation. “Who will I be this season?” “What do I want to portray to the world?” From school age kids to middle aged housewives, buying new clothes is as much about looking good as it is about creating a newer, better you.

I can recall, going off to college, plowing through fashion magazines, circling hot items, dog earring pages, tearing sheets and concocting a vision of who I wanted to be and what I wanted to look like. What would my fall look be? Tweeds and smart trousers! Grown-up blouses to be taken seriously. Skirts, skirts and more skirts! Durable yet stylish tote bags.

This process of defining who we are through fashion has become a crucial first step into who we hope to become in life. What we wear is our first defense. Before we open our mouths, our clothes do the talking and what they say can be as varied and diverse and the person who inhabits them. Clothes are not a substitute for substance, but they are the window dressing for the soul.

Even to this day, I use my clothing and style as a barometer. My clothes don’t define me but they are a key part in my expression. I doodle new styles I’m loving, what patterns I’m obsessed with (I have plaid on the brain) and what my style point of view will be.

In life’s changes; starting a new job, going away to school, moving to a new city, we must outfit ourselves for who we are and also who we hope to become. New clothing like new beginnings are less about the transition and more about coming into your own.

How are you renewing your wardrobe? Your life?

Required Reading: 9.21.12

By September 21, 2012 Links
Dressing Table

Dressing Table via Feminine Touch 1

How great is this quote from Oprah found via My Vicarious Life?!

Have a delightful weekend! Say Hi to Fall!

Inspiration Nation: A Few of My Favorite TED Talks

By September 20, 2012 Empowerment
Ted Talks

I am voracious when it comes to inspiration and motivation. I read every Daily Love email, stalk Oprah and Iylana “Call A Thing a Thing” Vanzant and read my Quran and daily devotion books. One of my favorite places to visit for inspiration is Ted.com. TED is a nonproft dedicated to spreading ideas. They host several conferences with thought leaders, philanthropists, bloggers, artists and anyone who has a message.

Ted.com houses all of the TED talks as well as other inspirational speeches and presentations. When I need to hear a good message, be inspired or think about things in a new way I visit TED. Here are a few of my favorite TED talks and inspirational videos.

1. Elizabeth Gilbert on Genius

2. Courtney Martin on Reinventing Feminism

3. Derek Sivers on Keeping Your Goals to Yourself

4. John Wooden on the Difference between Winning and Success

5. Derek Sivers on How to Start a Movement

6. J.K. Rowling on the Fringe Benefits of Failure

Watch these awe-inspiring talks and let me know what you think!

50 Shades of Accessories

By September 18, 2012 Accessories, Fashion, Jewelry, Pop Culture, Shoes, Trends
50 Shades of Accessories

No, I will not discuss the book to which this title is referring. I refuse to waste any time or creativity trying to voice the anger that the book’s popularity innately causes in me. Instead, I’ll focus on the positive influence the rising popularity of BDSM has had on the accessories department. Equal parts cheekiness and punk, this trend certainly adds a twist to any regular outfit.

I was initially inspired by a pair of rose gold handcuffs that Rachel Zoe received as a present from her husband on one episode of her show. Much to my chagrin, I found out they cost over $12,000 in real life .

Many ShopStyle and Net-a-porter searches later, I have come up with a few alternatives for those of us that unfortunately don’t have our own TV shows nor get paid upwards of $1 million/year to dress someone. Here you go – and enjoy!

Handcuff Bracelets

Necklaces

Spiked shoes

Will you be breaking out your crop and spikes and participating in this painless trend?

Required Reading: 9.7.12

By September 7, 2012 Links
Honeybee

Feminine Touch

x Short & Sweet!

 

Motivated Tuesday: Letting Go

By September 4, 2012 Empowerment
Champion Maneuvers

Today’s Motivated Monday post comes on Tuesday. Motivation doesn’t take a day off! 

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” 
― C. JoyBell C.

Champion Maneuvers

There will come in time in each of our lives when we will have to let go. Let go of a relationship, of a friendship, of a job or worse, of a dream.

Loosening your grasp on something you once held so dear is not easy. And at times it can feel like you’ve had your hopes and dreams ripped from you. But letting go and knowing when to let go is probably our minds (and bodies) best defense.

The things we want are not always the things we need. Learning and understanding this is one of life’s biggest lesson and a part of “growing up.”

Personally, I’ve had to let go of plenty of things. It never gets easier to let go but it does begin to make more sense. Letting go of the things that are not working or making us happy, leaves an open pathway. And having  faith that that pathway will be filled with goodness is our only job.

Let’s not lament the things we have to leave behind. Instead let’s look forward to the things that will come in their place.

Stylish Thinkers, what have you had to let go of recently? How did you manage? Please share.